Guest Post - Trust,Beauty & Affection

This is a guest post from my friend. I know this is first of many. I am excited that my friend decided to give a try in writing. He has chosen to remain anonymous. He lives in India with his wife and a daughter. Furthermore, he recently had a trip with friends. This article is his perspective and what he gained from the trip.

By the way, this is his first time writing an article or post of any kind out in public. If you find typos or any shortcomings, please be forgiving! :)

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It’s been a while since I had been on a fun trip. This one that I am going to tell you about is worth a mention because, it was one that my friends and I had been dreaming and longing for while. Any guesses? Yes 15 long years. While anybody’s guess on the contents of this read would be that it would be on the place that we visited and the fun that we had. But I intend to convey a completely different aspect of it that has left a deep impact on the way I perceive things now. It is the ability to measure situations and circumstances with one’s keen sense of observation and draw meaningful lessons. While some lessons are from situations that I was part of, some are outcomes of my observations. These situations helped me appreciate certain key aspects of life that we tend to ignore. If not for some deliberate attempt to observe situations and circumstances and digest it to see what comes of it.

Trust

Two situations that I was witness to, made me feel that we are now in a world that that has poisoned our minds. We now stay in one, where there is complete lack of it. The first one was an interaction with a person from whom we had rented our bikes. It was time to hand them over back, and we had given him a call to collect it from our resort. The young guy, should be in his early twenties came as promised. But he did not have our ID cards that he needs to return to us. He requested that he take one of the bikes and get the cards and take the rest later. My buddy and I became skeptical about the offer. We insisted that he get the card and then collect the all bikes together. So what made us do this? Why was there a lack of trust? Was it that this person had cheated us before? That was not the case. One in the group made a casual mention that people have met with issues while renting bikes at this place. After sometime, my friend advised me that we give him a chance. The guy came as promised and handed over the card. The second case was that of a girl whom one of was chatting with in a pub for some time. She had gone out to attend a call and promised to be back. Most of us said that she won’t come back and its normal there. But to all our surprise she came back and continued to have a genuine chat. Both instances bring out a genuine lack of trust amongst us towards people in general. While we can say that the input influenced the first one, the second one was an outcome of stereotyping. What one needs to keep in mind here, is that we are judging a person’s integrity when we show a lack of trust. Would we be fine if it was for us? In game of Cricket, there is a term called “Benefit of Doubt”. People use it when there is a ambiguity in decision. It is always in favor of the batsmen. Likewise, In this case the batsman here is the person being judged. Since there is always an ambiguity when judging his/her integrity, wouldn’t it be prudent to give a ‘benefit of doubt’ than to be prejudiced? Even the legal system place, says that a person is always guilt free unless proven otherwise. A regular display of trust may even encourage a cheat to lean towards righteousness. So, do we give the benefit of doubt when in doubt and make this world and trustworthy place?

Beauty

The second one struck me really hard. We were in one of the cafés for lunch. And as anyone would imagine from a bunch of lone young men, we were having a good time enjoying the beauty created by God. While we were doing this, my eyes fell on a young girl probably in her early twenties sitting amongst a group. The girl was dusky in complexion and amongst a group fair complexioned girls. A deeper observation made me realize her under confidence in that group. I continued to observe the dynamics quietly while enjoying my beer. I could make out that person sitting opposite was her boyfriend. When her turn came to serve for herself, I noticed that she served her boyfriend first and then took the left over. That one act of hers made me appreciate how beautiful she was. Isn’t this something that every guy would long from his girl? I am not here to advice people to see the inner beauty as anyone would anticipate. I am here to say that, do not worry about your looks. As long, you are beautiful from within there is always one who notices the beauty within you and that’s the person you should care about.

Affection/ Last Man Standing

While I have chosen ‘Affection’ to describe a moment here, I feel that the word would only undervalue the feeling that I want to describe. Besides, after having a fantastic trip, (thanks to the almighty who gave us breaks between the heavy showers!) it was time to go back home. We all flew till Mumbai together, and then I had to split to Delhi and the others to Chennai. I had around half an hours time for my boarding. We were standing there, savoring the last few minutes we could have together. Although, we all had a good laugh in those few minutes, we all knew that it was not enough for us. Commitments and responsibilities could only give us those three days of togetherness. Time had come for me to go for my security check. After posing for my bye bye snap, I gave my boarding pass and I card to the security officer. At each stage, I continued to look back to have a look at my buddies. As I kept moving forward and mounted the stairs, the number behind kept reducing. With the least expectation when I turned back to see if there is anyone from the last possible point, there was indeed one still waiting to say goodbye. I would describe this person as ‘the last man standing’ for me. A day would come, when I would be cremated and my body would be turning into ashes. I feel that this person would be there as ‘the last man standing’ bidding me bye reminiscing and cherishing the years that we had and the words that we spoke.

The situations discussed are not peculiar ones that happen to us once in a lifetime. They are just regular ones. Its just that, I made a deliberate attempt this time to observe them carefully and marinate them over and again. If not for this attempt, I would not have come up with the lovely lessons on life. While we always feel that we are part of a moment, we need to ask ourselves, are we present. A deliberate attempt next time, may show you your ‘last man standing’. Bye!! Till we meet again.

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